So, I have this dear friend who has the worst luck. It seems like every time something good is happening in her life, something else comes up that spoils the  vibe. After watching this pattern for years I finally said, “You know, I don’t like to say that people are cursed, but for real, what is happening to you? I think we should ask your ancestors.” She agreed. She also agreed to let me write about what happened and share it with you.

This was a different kind of reading for me. Usually in an Ancestor Reading I ask to speak with a well and healed ancestral guide who wants to support you in your life. This time I specified that I wanted to talk with a well and healed ancestor who has wisdom to share about why my friend continually encounters disasters when she’s trying to enjoy life.

I met an ancestral guide who took me to a dry, dusty place a long time ago. Sometime in B.C. she said. She told me a story of power-those who had it and those who sacrificed themselves because of it. I got a sense of a very strict religion that controlled what the people of that time were allowed to do. My friend’s ancestor (or was it her in a past life? Or maybe both because she is her own ancestor? Hard to tell) seemed to be sworn to uphold the tenets of this very strict religion.

I saw a vase break, people on their knees wailing, and heard, “the breaking of a covenant, a taboo was violated.” It was made clear that this person was harmed or killed because of this broken taboo. This was difficult to watch unfold. I felt angry and sad for this person long ago, who seemed to have given their life for a mistake. A mistake that broke a vase and “broke a taboo.” No one really did anything wrong but someone lost their life over it. The guide helped me understand that this ancestor had made a vow. A vow to protect the teachings of this religion with their own life. The promise was made in such a way that it lasted through lifetimes. This vow has been hanging around for a long, long time, spoiling my friend’s good moments in this life.

Then the guide showed me what my friend could do-a small, heartfelt ritual she could perform to honor this person’s death, cut ties to this vow, and start fresh. This is the power of talking with the ancestors-they give us the long view. Information we wouldn’t be able to know any other way. They help us find healing for our people and ourselves. They also, in my experience, put the power back in your hands. Let me tell you what I mean by that.

The ritual that this guide gave my friend didn’t involve anything expensive, just words and intentions. Most importantly, she needed to do it, not me. I want you to pay attention to this part because there are a lot of unethical spiritual practitioners out there who will say they are the only ones who can fix your problems. I’ve heard stories of practitioners telling clients that they are “cursed” and the only way to get rid of that curse is by paying the practitioner to light candles, do a spell, etc. Usually in this scenario there are more and more candles or spells that need to be paid for as time goes on.  You should always be suspicious of that kind of situation.

Could there be a situation where you pay a practitioner to do a spell for you and end up feeling good about it? Sure. But if someone is giving you information that feels scary (“You’re cursed!”) and wanting you to pay them because they are the only ones who can “lift the curse”… I think you get the idea.

My friend’s ancestral guide showed her the way she could address her own issue and I loved that the power was handed back to her. I hope it sets something right for the ancestor who didn’t get to have much power in their own life way back when. I am always honored to be the telephone when you want to talk with your ancestors. And it is also important for everyone to feel empowered by the process rather than trapped in it.